Shooting your age is not only a great individual accomplishment, but it’s one of the best things about golf.  In any other sport the milestone achievements are, for the most part, all in the rear view mirror by the time your odometer spins past 65.  But not our game.  In your seventies and eighties–and even beyond–you have the chance to do something that those younger, punkass whippersnappers in their fifties can only dream about.

This dude did it over 2000 times

In case you’re into records and stats, here are some relevant numbers:

Youngest guy to do it was 59 years old, oldest guy was 103, and the biggest margin between age and score was a 72 shot by somebody who was 93 years old.  These are supposedly all scores recorded at courses longer than 6000 yards.

But what about those of us who are in that nether world of the fifties and sixties, where decay has set in but serious old age has yet to arrive?  Can’t there be some sort of benchmark for us that’s catchier than shooting a net score that’s in red figures?  Do we really have to wait until we’re in that zone between par and the mid-eighties?

Here are two possibilities:

Shooting your pant size: Waist + inseam. Size matters folks.

Jared says this is easier in his old pair

The trophy score (applies to 9 hole scores only): In his novel, Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe divulged how you calculate the proper age of a trophy wife: you take half your age and add seven years to that.  So, for me, my trophy score is a tidy little 36 for 9 holes.  That’s a nice number. Haven’t done it, but if I do, I think it deserves just this sort of recognition.