One does…

Golf and politics.  They don’t mix particularly well, but given that there’s not a lot of real news in the golf world these days, aside from tournaments that happen on the far side of the world and empty speculation about endorsement deals, I thought we might just dive in since, well, you know why.

No, they don’t mix: Just a hunch but I imagine that most foursomes are in agreement politically. Just as in Dr. Suess (One group, two group, red group, blue group) there are red foursomes and there are blue foursomes.  And thus golf imitates the rest of life, in which we cluster in similar minded groups that enable us to reinforce our opinions while simultaneously heightening our disdain for the opposing point of view.  It’s like that old bit of advice about drinking: never mix, never worry.

Nothing is as it used to be:   So, who was the golfer in this election? The really square, uber-rich white guy with the car elevator, or the bi-racial dude who smoked weed as a kid and listens to rap music?  Whether you want to hear it or not, it says something about the game and about the country.

The other doesn’t

Explaining the Electoral College:   It’s match play.  The total number of strokes–or votes–doesn’t determine the winner.  It’s the player who wins more holes–or electoral votes–who comes out on top.  Think of it this way: this election was a 50 hole match between two evenly matched players.  To extend the metaphor to the breaking point, one guy was just monstrously long off the tee and was a lock to win all the par-5 holes.  The other guy was always dialed in like a laser on his irons, so the par-3 holes were always going to be his. As a result there were a lot of holes where there was absolutely no suspense about the outcome.  Instead, the winner would be determined on a subset of difficult par-4 holes, the most significant of which runs along Lake Erie.

Shocking news: According to people who were monitoring Twitter leading up to the election, the majority of PGA players were voting for Romney.  What a surprise.  If you need this explained to you, read my book, “Why We Golf.”